Facing my Artistic Fears

I struggled drawing women as a teen. Almost every time, I’d draw them with long faces, long nose bridges, stiff and skinny necks. Drawing a little girl with chubby cheeks or big heads is easy but to draw women? It was like Kryptonite. I’d be as bad at drawing women the way Rob Liefeld is to drawing perspectives in comics (we’ve all seen his Captain America 3/4 angle perspective or his disproportional drawing of legs).

In process of writing the last chapter of the Drafts project, I told myself it was time to face my fear, overcome it and grow as an artist. Thankfully, being a genuine human being and consent has rewarded me some small opportunities to get started.

I’d want to say my 1st subject in about 35% through. Doing the black outlines was easier than expected— I just had to take my time gently drawing with those strokes and found myself being gentler on the pen on my tablet than I usually am. Then again, women truly come in dynamically different shapes and curves. Granted, Gothic Bluety’s main hurdle is the gradients of blue and dark grey shades (particularly in her hair) and thus it makes what seems like a chore into an adventure instead. It’s also a great thing that I remembered my high school and college instruction in terms of using layers to work. I also love the variety in using Affinity Studio’s brush customization.

The subject I have lined up after I finish her is gonna be easier in terms of color variety but what makes her an interesting task is some of the tattoo details, her costume from her photo shoot that’s Halloween season-themed, as well as her skin tone and hair curls. Once again,

I’d like to thank you Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 for giving me that spark of inspiration to get up and work on art again. For the last 4 1/2 years, a lot of you only knew me for gaming content and streaming Let’s Plays but very few of you were aware of my enjoyment of art — be it as a musician, artist or author; thankfully the timing was right to really dive into it all again. In effect, art is my significant other, my mistress and muse all in one; I just pray that she loves me back with time.


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